turn up for the books

whats going on and when will it go wrong?
negative,cautious,cynical statement? whatever! I've learned so much by being smacked by life over the past year Im never going to be counting my chickens before they hatch at the chicken ranch ever again. This weekend though I went on a fantastic date,with a lovely,polite,down to earth guy who made me laugh my head off and completely lose track of time while we chatted non stop about anything and everything. There was no awkwardness from minute one. He said later an ex had told him 'you aint no oil painting,but there's something about you' not strictly true I thought cos he has a lovely face, there was something reassuring it which put me at ease immediately. We parted arranging another date and not dinner this time,a nice mid morning walk next week followed by stopping off at one of the lovely local pubs for a nice spot of lunch.So a successful initial introduction to the world of online dating and then, surprise number 2,text guy may have to change his name to bike guy as he actually turned up on time for our bike ride this morning and said he'd had such a good time he would really like to make it a regular thing. Looks like my instincts of him being better mates potential than dates potential may've been spot on. Now there's no alterior motive on either side, we are relaxed in each others company,right down to discussing dating and friendship!He's so much of a bachelor he could give ole cliff a run for his money,but he's fiercely loyal to his friends as I am to mine and I think I've made a new one.
I'll keep you posted on the other!

internet dating

What's your thoughts? and be honest! This week after being pissed off by text guy (who I'm getting on great with now there's no will they/won't they rubbish) and his unreliabilty,then being commandeered in a club by several guys who no doubt thought I was just theirs for the taking. I have joined an internet dating site! I decided to go for a paying one as I figured i may get a slightly better class of 'lonely guy sitting at computer'.
So I registered along with a friend of mine to Match.com (girls like to compare notes boys,so beware)and left it for a day. Hey presto got up in the morning and it was like Man shopping! I had 69 emails (omen?oops sorry that was a bit naughty hehe)Now this was on Saturday and I've had several responses from guys who I actually think seem pretty good bets for dates. But just to make sure they are who they say they are blah de blah de blah I've googled them.Does anyone else do that or is it just me?
So anyway I have my first blind date on Friday (I say blind,but I've seen pictures so no need for roses in lapels and newspapers tucked under arms)and he's a director for a pharmaceutical company not too far from me. We appear to have a lot in common and he's a straight talker like me so if there's no spark we know there'll be no playing games pretending there is.If anything from this I appear to be making some good friends as I'm not the kind of girl who gets all arsey if it doesn't work out and am perfectly capable of carrying on a platonic relationship and still enjoying their company. I have a long bike ride planned on Saturday with text guy and am looking forward to kicking his arse-though he reckons if I have a date on Friday involving alcohol I won't even manage 5miles, but I promise I'll behave;-)

*note-I promise not to get drunk and blog on Friday night like my niece cos she can still spell when she's pissed,well almost 'wold'*

Text Guy No More

We went out. We had fun. I got drunk. So did he. We have nothing in common bar physical attraction. We do like each other. We didn't want to rip each others clothes off after the weeks of tension.We're going to be bike partners.We will make better friends than lovers.I like him better already.

Pillars of Salt

Text guy wants to come out cycling with me!
He's doing some sort of triathlon type challenge thingy for charity but tends to do most of his training at the gym (nowt like going outside I say)
Anyway he was asking the other day, who I go with and how far etc etc. I reckon I go about 10 miles each day but as I have never measured it and don't have a fancy Jameslike contraption that tells me distance,calories and what I had for breakfast I really have no idea(can I borrow that though James when you move down here as I'd love to know all that stuff,well except the breakfast obviously).
All I know is I'm out on average about an hour and a half a day,rain or shine,music blaring without a care in the world.I get muddy,I get rained on,I get covered in bike oil when my chain comes off (happens frequently when I skip too many gears going uphill)and generally look like a right state when I'm done.
I also can cope when things go wrong i.e the chain scenario-today my chain came off whilst going up a particularly steep hill and became wedged tight in between the wheel and cogs,but I did not panic.It took me 10mins but I got it out and back on and was on my way without trauma.
My worry is,will I turn into a complete woossey girl if he's around or turn into this fiercely independent scary girl who is perfectly capable of turning a man to salt with the slightest glance if he even attempts to save me from the trauma of getting a bit of oil on my fingers.
You know what it's like sometimes when a guy is around ,things that you are perfectly able to do suddenly become things you'd need to get the fire brigade,police and SAS in to save you from. Spiders are my thing for that!I hate them and when I had a man around I'd turn into this frozen pillar of fear,only able to utter the words 'get it get it get it get it,QUICK,get it get it'
Now however,whilst still a bit afraid,I take a deep breath,approach the fiend with a mag or shoe and - animal lovers I make no apology for this - I splat the little bugger!
So anyway we shall wait and see,I'm only hoping he doesn't suggest it before our dinner date on Friday because Im sure the hosts don't just want me turning up accompanied by a 6ft tall pillar of salt as I've a feeling woossey is not my thing any more. hee hee

breathing

Life is looking up again. Friday night I was taken out by a friend (male) to a champagne and canapes evening.We had a great night sitting there waxing lyrical over how long it had been since we'd sat down and had a good chinwag about what was going on in each others lives,who we'd been seeing,what our future plans were what was happening in my ever changing life!
We had lots of champagne and talked all night and he told me that it was really great to see me so happy and strong again. I told him that my life now is going to be lived on a daily basis, I have ideas of how I'd like it to go but I'm never going to set anything in stone and as far as men go I don't particularly want a relationship but do want to have male company,someone who I can call up to go out,but not expect anything from nor he from me.
He thought this was possibly the most sensible thing he'd heard me utter all night (the champagne hit quite early on you see). He said too many women coming out of a long term relationship make the fatal error of diving straight into a new one without giving themselves a bit of breathing space to really find out what they want and who they are as an individual.
I thought about this a lot and I have to say he has a point. Up until now I've never been without a partner through my whole adult life,and have never ever had a break to find out what I really like doing for myself (I've discovered I love cycling and it's good for hangovers !)So when my ex left I didn't have a clue what to do when left to my own devices. It's funny how you fall into a pattern of doing things because someone else likes them.It's not always a bad thing as obviously that's what being a couple is all about,but I'd definitely say if I do have another relationship at some point that I will most certainly make time for me.
ps Geordie guy's never been heard of again,but Text boy's surprised me and asked me out to a proper grown up dinner party with his friends!Maybe I've been too cynical in my initial judgement of him,he's working hard bless him.

ho hum

Right I was all big and soooo self assured and deleted Text guy's number from my phone the other day,but doesn't make a slightest jot of a difference when he's not deleted mine = A lot of messaging
I tried to ignore them but when someone asks then 'you ok?' I can't help myself
Even worse when I tell him he's: a workaholic,impulsive,likes the chase but can take or leave the catch, doesn't want me in the flesh but would prefer a virtual playmate.
He explained why he's not been in touch over the last few weeks bar a few messages, of which I won't go into cos it'll make me sound even worse.Cue me starting to feel a little bit guilty.
He says he is definitely not a player, (as I'd heard from a reliable source, but I struggle to trust any man that eligible who says he's not one!) far from it.
I told him I thought he could have his pick of partner but just liked a bit of a challenge,he replied he could say the same about me (told you he was smooth!) Anyway to cut a very very long story short he then flirted,I then flirted back,he got naughty, I got naughty back and now we're back to square one and supposedly going out at the weekend.I am weak weak weak but oh it felt so so good.
Oh and Geordie boy has been notably absent since Saturday despite saying 'I'll call you tomorrow for a chat and we'll organise to meet up'! *pah*

ps please gohere and read John's post for the day,I defy anyone not to laugh.x