Back to life!

I used to be a painter, I used to have my own interior's shop, I used to be a jewellery designer, I used to be an artists model, I used to, I used to, I used to.................Now I'm a dinner lady.

I constantly hear things like, "god, you must hate doing that job", or, and this is my particular favourite, "why on earth would you want to do that, when you could get something so much better with more money".

What was that line in Spiderman about power and responsibility? Neither of these things hold much attraction for me as far as work is concerned. I had my time of wanting more, being ambitious, climbing up the ladder, wanting success and the kudos that went with it. Now I want a job where I can go in, do what I get paid to do (and well I may add), enjoy the social contact of my fellow workmates and the teenagers who grace the dinner hall at lunchtime, and be home in time to pick my daughter up from school. I dont want any stress, my personal life for the last few years has had as much stress as I'd never want to have to cope with. I love my job and the freedom it gives me and the stability it gives my daughter at home. I am fortunate enough in that I dont have to work full time but am constantly being questioned as to why I dont want to.

This week I was offered, out of the blue, a job from an old aquaintance to do some designs. It initially would involve doing some corporate work for a members only club wanting to develop their own line in jewellery, so would be a set amount of pieces which once designed I would have no more involvement in, but then came what it was thought by the other party, to be the sweetener. This job may lead (and I say may in the broadest term) to more work from members wanting individual commissions. Now I know many would jump at this, and my past self would have as well, but it's not me anymore. I dont need to be top of my game, I dont need to be taking phonecalls on my family time weekends and evenings, or checking up on orders, or chasing progress of craftsmen, or supply of gemstones, or travelling to meet clients, or dealing with what would be impossibly high demands from the well heeled or media types this partcular club aims itself at. So I said no.

After much begging from my aquaintance, I agreed to give some ideas to the corporate bit of the deal, but only as a favour to her ( which I hasten to add would be stored and recouped at a later date). I do not want to be paid and I do not want any further involvement and I most certainly dont want the commissions. This was questioned by her, my boyfriend and needless to say a couple of my workmates who yearn to be someone other than one of the dinnerladies at their local school.

All I want is a nice quiet life to enjoy with those I love. I want my daughter to have her Mum to take her to school in the mornings and pick her up from school in the afternoon. I want to be able to take her to her piano lessons and go to school plays, I want to enjoy just being me and not have to mind my p's and q's with someone with more money than sense.

What's wrong with just wanting to be Mum?